Monday, December 20, 2010

Four stories of broken romance

Here's a humor article I wrote for "19th Century Russia," an Orthodox Christian humor blog. It's managed by my friend Brigid Strait. The article is satirical, and it's four stories of broken romance.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

We interrupt this interruption...


As I sit in my parents' house, getting ready for my third winter as a professional resume submitter, I hear this voice:

"We interrupt this interruption to bring you the following important announcement: We have received a number of complaints from local observers in your area that an unusual number of lives seem to be on hold. We are aware of this problem.

"If this seems to be taking longer than it should, please note that recessions are caused by inactivity. What’s happened is that an unexpected amount of money and an unexpected number of people gathering at this point in spacetime have caused an unexpected amount of mass to coalesce, thus depressing the continuum. This may seem to slow things down, and the recovery, at least for an unenlightened observer such as yourself, stuck in the spacetime depression. While we apologize for the negative feedback loop you seem to be stuck in, please be reassured we will prevent you from crossing your own event horizon and creating a black hole. It is true that no one seems to think you have a right to a job, a place to live, or any of that other stuff they said you’d get if you studied hard in school, but please be assured that we are committed to the continued existence of your particles.

"If things seem a little blue when you try to look beyond your situation, that’s just because light is moving more slowly where you are. If you would like to take photographs, may we recommend a filter for your camera’s lens?

"Please feel free to move about the continuum. In fact, you might try moving and talking a little faster. From our perspective, you’ve got quite a drawl, which is pretty humorous.

"Please be assured that your life will eventually resume. Be glad for all that time you spent in post-Soviet republics. Your trajectory out of the spacetime depression will be curved, but the experience taught you to be thankful it isn’t parabolic.

"Thank you for your attention during the interruption. We now return you to your regularly scheduled interruption."

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Getting published, inescapable committees, and a grade-school joke

Dear Friends and Family,

There is this grade-school riddle that contains more wisdom than I would have thought when I first heard it: "Why was ten afraid? Because seven eight nine." I think it is an accurate description of our current economic situation. The recession started in 07, and developed into a panic in 08, devouring 09. And, despite the fact it's technically over, 10 is a terrified year, afraid to hire any of us.

Life for Miri and me continues to be full of educational and enlightening experiences, all of which offer inadequate pay and no benefits. But, staying sane is a matter of giving thanks for all things, for example, the time to write a book.

Getting a Book Published

After many months of trying to find a publisher, I have finally entered a contract with Regina Orthodox Press in Massachusetts, which will publish "Heaven Help The Single Christian: Your (Practical) Guide to Navigating Church as You Search for a Godly Mate" It's a humorous advice book that offers both laughs and a broader context of struggle for the single Christian. Much of it is based upon my own experiences of striking out at coffee hours, church conferences and monasteries before I met Miri, as well as the experiences of friends of mine. I've done as much as I can to remove identification from the characters involved, so all I can say if you recognize yourself in there is that you should have been nicer to me.

The book is due out by Christmas, which is light-speed in the publishing world. The director said he really needed something additional to go in the holiday catalog, and he accepted my book as a rush-job. The first printing run should be 1,000 or 2,000 copies, and the price will be $15-$17. At 10 percent royalties, it doesn't add up to much, especially when you consider that hardly anyone pays retail price. On the continuum of what I was getting paid as an author to what J.K. Rowling earns, it's, um, well, it's on the continuum, which is a blessing.

My task for 2011 is learning how to do a book talk, going to conferences and giving it, and selling copies of the book myself directly out of box from the publisher. Other authors have told me when you're starting out, that's how you make most of your money. If any of you knows of events and places with lots of single Christians, let me know, and I can try going and selling the book. And, it would be great if it were near your house so I can sleep there and eat your food. Publication date to come soon.

A challenge to your religion – committees

If I ever write that other book about religious conversion, I'm going to include a section on that point in your spiritual life when you feel an urge to wander because of all the committees you get appointed to. Once you're thought of as a regular, stable churchgoer, when there are events planned that need workers, it is impossible to avoid getting a staff infection.

In this case, the event is the All-American Council of the Orthodox Church in America, due to be held in Bellevue, Wash., in October 2011. Our previous parish council treasurer retired from her position so she could be the lay chairwoman of the event, and then I got elected treasurer to replace her. And now I am on a couple of additional committees for the council, one purposed with getting local media to cover the event, the other to create a city guide for the out-of-towners to check out the Seattle-Bellevue area.

We are renting a large hotel and are expecting 800 people to attend. This council is where all things administrative, financial, legal, spiritual and leadershipish get reported, discussed, voted on and hopefully settled. It happens once every three years and is kind of a big deal. The last one of these was akin to a very nasty marital therapy session, so we're really hoping that this one goes in a somewhat normal manner. It's the first time this event has been held on the West Coast, and we've even gotten Alaska Airlines to be our "official airline." 


One scary thing in sitting on these committees is that I'm the youngest one there. Not that being 31 in a room full of 50-year-olds is scary, but this means that if I continue this habit of sitting on committees, I'll someday have more experience than most people and be more likely to get appointed. This makes me wonder if some of the early Christian martyrs decided to defy the Roman authorities as a means of getting out of chairing committees at church.

Independent Journalism for Important Stories

I'm also continuing my work these days as a news reporter. You may remember my story about the King County 10-year Plan to End Homelessness. Now I've got a story about a problem that's both disturbing, and very interesting because the campaign to help those affected by it is very new, and not fully developed.

The problem is commercial sexual exploitation of children, a long clinical term that basically means forced prostitution of underage girls. The further I delve into the topic, the more upset I get, and the more I'm convinced of the need for a story to get done.

I've been interviewing human-services people, police officers, and I'm going to interview someone who'd been formerly exploited.

The interesting parts of this story are the complexities of laws that both help and prosecute minors involved in prostitution, the comprehensive and expensive services to help them recover, and the fact that this is a demand-driven economy. The disturbing parts are the obscenely abusive things the pimps do to control their girls, the fact that the girls don't tend to live very long after getting in to "The Life," and finally the fact that every girl saved simply acts as an absence in the market, inspiring pimps and customers to try harder to get what they want.

This is a story that's getting funded through spot.us, a web site that puts journalists' story ideas up where people can pledge money for them. The story is about two-thirds funded right now. Another interesting feature is that people can take a survey for a group looking for research information and by doing so, earn $6 to $10 for the story. It gives us a boost whether you pledge or not.

Other notes

That's the news from Ruthfordville right now. Outside of that, life generally goes on – Miri continues her half-time job at the Point Defiance Zoo as a zookeeper and climbing toy for endangered leopards. Right now, we are winding up a mini-vacation to Helena, Mont., where my cousin, Robin, got married to a fellow named Grant. She planned some really cool things into her wedding, including a pre-wedding hike to the top of Mt. Helena. I also got to visit the Montana State Museum here, which had an amazing gallery of paintings by Charlie Russell, a painter who was hired by the Great Northern Railroad around the beginning of the 20th century to paint scenes that would make people want to take vacations in Montana. Such a wonderful concept – paying an artist to increase your business, and making money for all involved, and getting enduring masterpieces out of it in the end. Sigh, now we raise money through sites such as spot.

There will be a load of lovely pictures both from the wedding and the hikes, but I'm still too much of a luddite to buy a digital camera, so it'll be a while before I get any of those up there for viewing.

Please keep in touch. I'd love to hear from you!

Love,

Thomas Eric Ruthford

Thursday, September 23, 2010

I need a new title

I have a publisher interested in my book, which makes me very happy! But, he says he doesn't like my title, "Coffee Hour Courting: Dating for the Devoted." I'm not actually that crazy about that title myself, but it was the best I could think of...

So I need a new title and have been banging my head against the pad of paper for a couple of days now. This title needs to be short, clever, and then it needs a subtitle that is a complete summary of what the book is about.

I can think of lots of "serious" titles that might make sense, like "Bringing your date home to Jesus" or " Meeting a Godly Mate" or some such variation. "Searching and churching" is just cheesy...

HELP!

Monday, June 28, 2010

I got published! And some other stuff, too...

I have had one of those rare events in a writer's life recently, Getting Published And Getting Paid For It. Here is a link to my story that I wrote for the Seattle PostGlobe about King County's 10-year-Plan to End Homelessness. It's an ambitious plan that I hope succeeds, and the government and community leaders involved in the work have done a lot to coordinate their efforts, although the homeless population in Seattle and King County remains stubbornly high. I really enjoyed researching the story, and I got to apply a lot of what I learned from back when I was the chief financial officer of Raphael House of San Francisco, a homeless shelter for families.

This story was the first crowd-funded story in Seattle, meaning that it got funded through a Web site called Spot.us, which has a new way of funding independent journalism. News reporters put story ideas up on the site, and then donors pledge money to it. It's similar to how public radio gets funded, but one story at a time. In about a week, enough donations came in so that it became a paid job for me, and believe me, is that ever special. Thank you!

Miri (dearie wife) and I have had some other fun things that we've done over the past few months. One was Pascha at church, when Miri sang with the choir, and I got to take pictures with my trusty Pentax ME Super that is as old as I am. Several people at church said, "Your camera went click!" I like going to the special camera store and buying 1600 speed film. I'm still having a hard time adjusting to being an antique owner at the age of 30. Pascha (also called Easter) is a midnight service for Orthodox Christians (we don't waste time) and part of the service involves circling the church three times. I took this picture of Fr. Athanasius Shaw carrying a candle.


The Gospel passage we read on Pascha night is the Prologue of John. I like this picture because it has the priest carrying the light into the world, which is reflective of John 1:5, "The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it."

Miri has had some interesting adventures in the world of zoos and aquariums recently. She began an internship at the Seattle Aquarium in January and got to take care of animals and observe the dominance patterns between a big old seal, Al and a smaller teenage-like seal, Commander who was challenging him for a while -- until the old man shouted him down and equilibrium was restored. They know that this happened because Miri sat and watched them for several weeks, counting up the number of times which one shouted at the other. The Aquarium internship turned into an Aquarium job, and now she is a part-time educator there. But, since it is summer, there are not any school field trips coming through, and she doesn't have work. But, in September, she will.

She is also continuing her part-time job at the Point Defiance Zoo, which has been full of excitement and camera crews recently. First, the zoo received a family of clouded leopards from Thailand. This is a rare species, and they are tree-climbers. Miri has gotten to play with the cubs several times, and she has gotten climbed on and drooled on several times. Here's a picture:




And if that weren't enough, the zoo also now has two Sumatran tiger cubs. They are younger and do not have teeth yet, and Miri has gotten to play with them a few times, too. It's believed that only 500 of them exist in the world, about 350 of which are in the wild. These tigers got on to the Today Show about a week ago.



The bandage is for tendonitis. This little girl cub does not have teeth yet. You can help name them. There's an on-line vote open now!

 I don't know how many kids say, "I want to be a toy for endangered species to play with when I grow up," but Miri seems to have accomplished this.

I am still submitting lots of resumes, and getting the occasional job interview, so there's hope yet.  Right now I am working on a marketing study for the Pacific Lutheran University bookstore and its quest for profitability.  It's a nice change, but I'm still waiting for that Real Job With Benefits. I've also had one job interview recently, but I know from experience not to get my hopes up too high. This time of economic challenge has been instructive to us, however. I really think this is God's way of showing people who don't drink what alcoholism will do to their finances.

One recent accomplishment I made was completing a certificate in Geographic Information Systems. Our group project was to make a map of the avalanche paths surrounding Alpental Ski Area at Snoqualmie Pass here in Washington state. It was a fun project, although it made me realize that GIS work is more computer work than it is map work, and it was the map end of things that appealed to me. I am, however, hopeful that I can work mapping into a job soon.




Coming up soon, Miri and I are going to Vancouver, BC, for a two-day trip to see the science museums, aquariums and and such up there. We got a coupon with Greyhound and decided this would be an ideal trip for us. Additionally, we are going on a six-day bike trip across Eastern Washington. The trip is called the Ride Around Washington, and is put on by the Cascade Bicycle Club. Also, Patrick, my Dad, and Jeffrey are going on this trip. One cool thing is that I took my green custom mountain bike to the shop and got it modified so that it will ride more like a road bike, and ride faster. (This bike is 12 years old and went to Ukraine and back with me and helped me lose 90 pounds. That, and the borcsht.) Here's a picture from last year's trip:






This picture is one of the numerous scenic lakes you'll find going up Washington Pass, which we did on Day 2 of RAW last year. Thankfully, there won't be any mountain passes that challenging

Finally, we are looking forward to going hiking now that the mountain snow is melting. I recently bought a book about best hikes with dogs, and I want to try going to Dewey Lake, near Chinook Pass, with Jisa the brave scout dog.


View Larger Map

So, that's the news from Ruthfordville. I hope that you are well, too. Feel free to write me, or leave a comment on the blog -- I will get it even though I don't update the blog too often.

Your friend,
Thomas Eric Ruthford

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Spot.us story pitch

Hi all,

My story idea has been featured on the debut of Spot.us, a new Web site that intends to fund journalism by proposing story ideas to the readers themselves and asking for pledges. Here's a link to my story idea, about King County's ambitious plan to end homelessness by 2014. This plan was drawn up in 2005 by community and government leaders to take a whole new approach to homelessness that aimed to end the shelter-based approach to maintaining homelessness to a supportive housing model that ends homelessness by quickly moving people from being homeless to being housed. One of the things they said that they would do is build or convert 9,500 units of housing for this purpose.

This plan is halfway through, and we're in the stages of an anemic recovery from a crippling recession, and it's time to check in on the plan -- are they still able to build these units of housing, and how much money is it saving us to use this housing approach as opposed to a shelter approach?

I am going to use my skills as a journalist and as a former manager of a homeless shelter in San Francisco to explain and illustrate this effort to end homelessness. And, I'll publish this on the Seattle PostGlobe, an on-line news Web site that is trying to find its path as a non-profit news organization. We had a nice meeting today of PostGlobe people, and the most memorable line was, "This organization seems like the Post-Intelligencer in Exile." And, this is unfortunately true. We need to get a new mission and a new purpose in our community-based journalism and let go of that defunct newspaper.

Miri and I are doing all right, but we're still looking forward to that wonderful day when we can get our own apartment again.When it will come, we don't know. She now has two part-time jobs, one at the Point Defiance Zoo as a zookeeper and the other at the Seattle Aquarium as an educator. I have two temporary jobs coming up that each should last about two weeks, one as a scorer of standardized school tests and the other as a customer service representative at REI's call center. This is positive news, but I really need a full-time job. I have had a few job interviews that went well recently.

Miri and I had a wonderful Pascha at Holy Resurrection Orthodox Church and a short trip to Vashon Island. We took lots of pictures, and I'm attaching one here.

We hope you are well! Christ is Risen!

Monday, February 1, 2010

Places I've been published

Hi all,

I wrote a review of an imaginary book, "Dumped But Dispassionate," and it got published on the Onion Dome. The Onion Dome is a news site with parody and lampoon-style articles poking fun at Orthodox Christians who take themselves too seriously.

Also, I've published some stories recently on Booksie, a cool site where authors can post prose. I've put non-fiction about my time in Ukraine on there, as well as three short fictional stories. I would love to have your comments on any of them.

Your friend,
Thomas Eric Ruthford

Monday, January 11, 2010

Two of my favorite photos



Recently I developed two rolls of film, and got two wonderful pictures. Here's one of Miri in Lowell's Restaurant at the Pike Place Market, which I call "Contemplatively Chocolating." For more of these, click here.



This other one is of me at Spray Falls in Mt. Rainier National Park. For more of this album, click here.

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Fundamental walls

I keep wishing I could write a good book about religion with broad appeal, especially to those without a religion, but I think there are some fundamental walls I will run into no matter what:
  • a. Most people are set in their habits.
  • b. Most of those people who are willing to change their habits aren't that interested in theology.
  • c. Given the focus on this-worldly justice that most non-religious people have, I think they'd make better Jews than Christians.
I keep thinking that if we could only find the right appeal to the unchurched, we could start an "Awakening" with the fullness of our sacramental life. We could be more than these chatty parishes of 100 or so people, one or two per city. I imagine myself as some kind of bridge between the world of unaffiliated ethical reasonableness and sacramental Christianity, but really, I'm just part of a small group that wanted to make this kind of change, and did.

And then, we Orthodox find other people who have come in this way, and we think we're witnessing a trend. It's a significant portion of those joining the church, but an insignificant portion of America.

In summary, this book is going to take a lot longer to write than I thought it would.